really?
REALLY?!!! come on.

if you really think this is a paparazzi picture and she ISN’T STAGING THESE PICTURES then you should be taken out back and given a swift backhand. like, you’ve gotta be kidding me with this shit.

Ironic how these playful, yet sexy pictures are released of Brooke at her lovely little beach day and so luckily she’s dressed to the nines and has a nifty little camera on hand. Also ironic that they are released as rumors of her being in Playboy are floating around.

yikes… get over yourself, homegirl. Quite frankly your semi-cleft chin and painful eerie hulk-ness of your face/body/life would scare me and those flipping through the pages of Playboy. You know what? I say do it… it would be in direct correlation with the rate of celibacy that would rise from the issue.

Ouchies.. The Grey’s just on a rampage today, huh?

ok that is the cutest little puppy I have ever seen in my life.
now about Jessica’s greasy roots, and unflattering maxi dress?

no comment.
here’s Jess leaving coming into LAX. WITH HER CUTE LITTLE BABY GIRL DOG DAISY.
(are you vomiting yet?)

QUOTE OF THE DAY!:
“I’m a miracle dude… I don’t know why!”
-Patrick Swayze at LAX on his recent battle with pancreatic cancer

Good ol’ Ghost, Patrick Swayze has been seen out and about and looking quite great!! The 55-year old actor was seen flying to Chicago where he’s filming his new series for A&E called “The Beast”.

After his diagnosis in April, he had been recieving treatments of chemotherapy; something must have worked, because his wife Lisa released a statement saying they were “thrilled” with his reaction to the treatments. “We can’t help but feel that all the prayers, meditations and good thoughts sent his way by everyone has made a difference. Thank you!”

I’m digging all the positive energy and optimism with Patty- definitely a good guy and we at thegreylist definitely wish him a speedy recovery with all our prayers to him and his family.

Jude Law just did the commercial and the print ads for Dior Sport Homme in the Bahamas, quoted in saying that it’s hard to do commercials because you have to get in the part quicker (duh). I know it’s hard for Jude Law to get in the part of a dude who knows he’s sexy… because he’s so used to playing such humble parts (”Alfie” anyone?) or dude who knows he’s sexy but drunk in “The Holiday”.

It’s rumored that his print and commercial will not be running in the UK and the United States, saying that he will possibly be replaced for UK and US ads with a different male model. Also rumored, he had his receding hair line photoshopped. yikes—

I mostly think he’s just kind of toolish.

Designers, you have 10 minutes to make a dress out of these shards of glass, face oil-blotting papers, and the wrapper from my Cliff bar this morning… go.

Sure enough, its done. It gets done and it’s damn good too. It’s like watching a couture Macguyver, I don’t even know where they find these people but Project Runway is one of the gems that BRAVO! picked up that actually has some talent to it (thanks Denise Richard’s show…). Unfortunately, if you haven’t heard… this little baby is going straight to Lifetime TV after it’s last season. Wondering why you didn’t even know it already started? Some say it’s Bravo’s bad-wishing the show goodbye.

Now, don’t get me wrong. PR has a serious cult following, but can these people continue to tune in to the channel that’s infamous for 4 hour long movies starring young Sandra Bullock and Zach Morris from Saved by the Bell? I mean, literally… you turn on Lifetime and I guarantee it’s a movie about a young woman who is attacked/raped/abused/addicted and overcomes adversity while simultaneous empowering herself to be independent from men and successfully fulfilled… while also starring every actress imagineable.

Sorry, tangent. I know a girl who is all about Lifetime, I just can’t hang like she does. Either way, Bravo is now testing out some new shows to fill the spot (get ready for this one):

• America’s Top Artist: Sarah Jessica Parker thinking she knows art (stick to the shoes, babygirl)
• Fashion House: a British take on basically the same idea as Project Runway
• Top Chef: Masters: already a bad idea, former stars of Top Chef coming back again for another 15 minutes

And then the new lineup coming fall (…again, get really excited here):

• The Rachel Zoe project: starting Sept 8th (yikes)
• The Real Housewives of Atlanta (…….really?!)
• Tommy Hilfiger Presents: Ironic Iconic America

I’m officially throwing my TV out the window.

QUOTE OF THE DAY!:
“I have done three girl-on-girl kisses on-screen. And, yet, I’ve never done any (lesbian experimentation) in my real life. When lesbian friends tell me they’re in love with me after our friendship has been cemented, it always shocks me.”
- Selma Blair on mistaken lesbian connections

Get that, girl.
Hellboy 2 hottie, Selma Blair talking about her cult following after her on-screen kiss with Sarah Michelle Gellar from 1999’s Cruel Intentions. She’s obviously doing something right, Hellboy 2 opened with a $35.9 million dollar debut.

Blair diggs the movie genre saying, “when I was a child I loved fairy tales that ended badly [...] I have a morbid fascination with dead things, but I see the beauty in it. I think decay can look quite gorgeous”. uhh, kinda creepy but whatever. I have always liked Selma Blair (duh, calling all fans of “The Sweetest Thing”!!!)

What’s next for Blair? Kath &Kim starring herself and Molly Shannon. Shannon playing the matron Kath, who is a dysfunctional mother living in a Florida suburb who’s highly involved with… herself; while Selma plays daughter Kim who returns home after leaving her husband.

I’m excited for the exit of reality tv and the return of the sitcom. I’m sure it will be quite funny. And for that, welcome to the List!

QUOTE OF THE DAY!:
“it seems like i gotta do wrong to get your attention
but maybe when i call this man up, you’re finally starting to wake up
i think i’m gonna have to cheat, to keep your eyes on me
but maybe if i make you jealous, you’re finally starting to wake up”

yes. that’s right. Hayden Panettiere has a philosophical/songwriter side like the rest of us. What’s not to love? Perfect relationship advice, edgy music video, heartfelt lyrics, and talking about callin up this man. I mean, you really can’t lose here.

WTF MAN. WHY IS EVERYONE A SINGER/ACTRESS NOW? This is not ok. And even worse? Spokeswoman for Candies? BARF. Candies… the shoe that epitomized the 90’s. (Next to Sketchers of course). Candies are like Crocs… just shouldn’t be done. Candies is fully endorsing this piece of crap song about going out to the clubs… Haydens like, a fetus. I can’t even look at that ad… it’s giving me a cavity.

So Hayden clearly wins this round… fully endorsed by a hip shoe company, out with a new hit single that sounds EXACTLY like “Stars are Blind”, I think she should fully rule this world. Ugh, this bitch annoys me so much. Welcome to the List.

Thanks to Paul Heyman, cornering the seemingly pretty uncomfortable two of a trifecta of Hugh Hefner’s gfs. Holly Madison and Bridget Marquardt were there judging for Playboys 55th anniversary Playmate of the Year contest whilst Kendra Wilkinson was nowhere to be seen. Questions were raised as to why she wasn’t there and if it was intentional or not.

Heyman clearly annoys the shit out of Bridget and Holly but prys into whether they “hate” Kendra or not. The Playboy empire probably has a great Public Relations person but you could tell that Bridget and Holly were brainwashed to give somewhat standardized answers, sounding like PR robots with automated answers. Shit, those two are 34 and 28, respectively. Kendra just turned 23 and had a bangin’ bday party at Crobar- with her other gf’s not present.

 look at homegirl, she just DGAF. Rumors have been floating around that Kendra isn’t even one of Hef’s gf’s, she was just brought on so Holly and Bridget could sacrifice her and suck the youth out of her… I mean, to bring a youth perspective to the show. A friend of her tells Page Six, “Holly and Bridget hate her [...] They’re totally jealous. She has her own empire now. She’s got a clothing line, a modeling career and an exercise empire. They’re just sitting there hangin’ with Hef.”

It’s true, who gives a shit. Kendra’s made a name for herself, got some free shit and some good stories out of it, she’s hot as hell and young as fuck. Time for her to get the hell out of there before Hef breaks his back and Holly goes apeshit.

JOEL. MCHALE. YES.

Easily one of the funniest men on TV… and Details magazine agrees. Featuring a pretty lengthy article in their new issue (out on stands now) about E!’s own Joel McHale. Capturing the homes of about 6.6 million viewers a week, this cable show has not only been the birthplace of many a-knee slapper but mostly become a place in our hearts, aww.

Joel McHale simply is rude enough to call it as it is; idiots, xenaphobes, socialites, paparazzo, lack of common sense, and ultimately, a grasp on what we know today as ‘pop culture’. Biting wit that appeals to a demographic that call themselves the social elite and still funny pictures for those who don’t get it. A masterful show in itself.

The man is a comedic genius and somewhat of a babe. The mixture of his extreme criticism and his humbling humor makes it a show that brings you a man you love to hate or hate to love. But mostly because he brings us segments of “Dutch Oven” (note: if you haven’t seen this, then you’re not worthy of living). Either way, The Soup is great in its popular segments and funny frontman (bonus points for alliteration)- definitely check out the article or even online… http://men.style.com/details/features/full?id=content_7087

(I mean, who leaves their computer anyway right?) Joel, we proudly welcome you to the list.

Seriously, I feel like I devote entirely way too much time to this wench but this is hilarious. Homegirl face shoves her own damn security guard. Amy Winehouse, DGAF.

QUOTE OF THE DAY!:
“I’ve been in Australia filming Big Brother, in which my housemates and I are confined and sealed off from the outside world, much like the chickens who are crammed inside barns for KFC. Fortunately, I won’t be stomped to death, have my legs broken or be scalded to death in a tank of hot water—yet, as PETA’s undercover videos have revealed, the chickens raised for KFC’s restaurants in Australia often suffer these abuses.”
-Pam Anderson &Peta protesting KFC.

I’m officially pissed. You mess with KFC, YOU MESS WITH ME!!!!!!! Damnit, Pam why couldn’t you just die after Barb Wire (sweet movie and tat reference). That was the last best thing you ever did. Well maybe the Lit video… was that before or after? Not that it matters.

Crazy woman is in Australia taping Big Brother but instead of reading her lines and looking hot she has decided to get all nutty and protest the local KFC. Really? I don’t even think she’s had the mac and cheese there… its the effing bomb. Freaking biscuits. I will go through the drive-thru happily with a bucket of their biscuits only and sit in the parking lot until they are done (thats what I call parkin’ lot pimpin’).

Anyway- Babygirl has lost her damn mind. Personally I respect the whole PETA idea, I’m just a natural carnivore who fuckin LOVES extra crispy chicken. She just needs to calm down, nobody got anywhere by being a huge bitch in hooter’s shorts… let’s be real here, right?

wtf dude. Mariah Carey looks really freaking good.
LOOKIT HOW SKINNY SHE IS!!!!

Anyway- she’s on the cover for August’s Elle magazine, of course talking about her bullshit with Nick Cannon. (Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely LOVED “Drumline” but it doesn’t change the fact that he’s kind of toolish).

If you read the story on http://www.elle.com/coverstory/14073/mariah-carey-nick-cannon-wedding-touch-my-body-elle.html the article starts out on how Mariah made the reporter wait two hours so she could paint her nails. Yeah, Mimi’s kind of an asshole- but a diva nonetheless! DI-VA!! I’d be bitter too, if I made “Glitter”, but we can’t hold that against her, now can we? …wrong. Welcome to the List!

Okkkkkkkkkkkkk, so hahahahfdksjafdl;ajfklda to all the people who are now kicking themselves for having that damn iPhone. Seriously, the phone is pretty sweet but opening up the market to make it 200 bucks? So many tools are going to have that phone slash will look even more like idiots because they have to use a bluetooth in the car.

July 11th. JULY 11TH. The fateful date when the new 3G iPhone will be released upon this world (personally, I think it’s going to be the damn apocolypse… the only way the Lord could reach out to us is via text msg and cheap iPhones). 8am. 8AfreakingM. Apparently there are already camp-outs started by the NY Mac Store. All AT&T as well as Mac stores will be opening at 8am to sell each customer ONE. ONE. Limited access to each person.

The O2 website was made available for pre-order but has already faced huge problems due to “high levels of demand”, in result suspending the website. Quite honestly, I thought I’d go and pick one up but at this point I’m freaking terrified of Mac people. This shit is CRAZY. Now everyone will be getting all crazy on their iPhones, any time anyone asks a question SOMEONE will look that shit up on their iPhone. Anytime I ask what the weather is like, SOMEONE will whip out their iPhone.
-”whats the capital of Florida?”
“let me look it up on my iPhone… &I can tell you the weather forecast, movie times in Florida, and possible hurricane patterns”
-”…”

yeah. its like that now. Just think about that before you WHIP OUT YOUR IPHONE. Now EVERYONE can do it, so it’s not that special. and for the low low price of $200 you’ll all be tools. So much for the iPhone elite…iPhone on the Grey? Not for too long…tools are not Grey.

Drew Barrymore and that Mac guy split up. Justin Long, otherwise known as the hot Mac guy or the kinda funny guy who was in Live Free or Die Hard is now going to go back to funny roles in B movies, secondary roles in A movies, or being the uber cool mac guy.

Drew Barrymore’s rep has confirmed the split- Drew and Long first spotted August of last year made it quite clear to all they were together. They were together for about a year, just shy of 11 months. But the good news is, THEYRE STILL FRIENDS. Oh good, I can sleep tonight safely knowing this.

They told US Weekly that they will remain friends. Because if they weren’t remaining friends I’m sure the first person they’d gush to about it is US Weekly. Although if I were Justin Long I’d start pulling cheap shots about Tom Green and Charlies Angels: Full Throttle; but that’s probably why I’m not dating Drew Barrymore. Looking forward to the uncomfortableness that will prevail when “He’s Just Not Into You” premieres soon and they have to walk down the carpet together. aaawwwkkkwwarrrddd.

Ok, I had to do it. Steven Tyler wasn’t kidding when he wrote “dude looks like a lady”. Mr. Thomas Beatie, the former Tracey Lagondino, shows the world you can have your cake and eat it too. Actually, that cliche sounds a little too “Donner Party” to me… meaning in that, he had a sex change and still had a baby girl.

Everyone’s all pissed off about this, after he revealed his pregnancy on the Oprah Winfrey show, saying “I feel it’s not a male or female desire to have a child [...] it’s a human need. I’m a person and I have the right to have a biological child”. Honestly, I’m more pissed that he was on Oprah than the fact that he had a child. That lady is CRAZY. She get’s those crazy eyes, you know, the ones when she’s giving out buckets of cash to everyone in the audience and starts screaming the whole time? …not a good environment for a pregnant man.

Who knew. Homeboy made Arnold Schwarzenegger’s hit movie a reality (yeah, don’t pretend like you didn’t see Junior). So he gave birth to a beautiful HEALTHY little girl in Bend, Oregon with a sealed off room for privacy checked under a false name. He changed his gender legally to a man and had his breasts removed whilst taking male hormones.

His wife Nancy was and is supportive, as they had publically let known that they bought donor vials from a cyrogenic sperm bank, and in opposition from the good doctors words, inseminated at home. Planning on raising the child traditionally, “I will be my daughter’s father and Nancy will be her mother. We will be family”.

Good health and good wishes to the family and their new baby girl. I say, to hell with it… people might be pissed or freaked out or whatever but as long as the child is raised with love, that’s all we can really ask right? I mean it could have been worse… he could have named his child Apl (personal Gwyneth attack… yes). or even worse, Oprah.

Welcome to the list.

QUOTE OF THE DAY!:
“Just go all out with it!”
-Tila Tequila to usmagazine.com on Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson

Obvi we need to listen to Dalai Tequila, because she’s currently writing a book (LOL) called “Hooking Up with Tila Tequila” which is a self-help book. Seriously, any body who’s willing to buy that piece of shit is doomed, idiot’s can’t help themselves… they’re IDIOTS.

ANYWAY.
happy 22nd birthday to Lindsay- keeping it low-key with [i really hate this word] Gal-Pal SamRo with a nice day at Disneyland, getting some lunch, and getting a movie. Her bday bash was last weekend, hanging out with a select few and then just hanging out and enjoying some time alone.

I will say this, it’s nice to NOT see Lohan’s crotch getting out of a car, her drunken-ass freckles with some gross faced paparazzi picture being kicked out of a club, or her wearing some skank outfit outside of a club with a ciggarette. Her pics of her going shopping and getting movies to rent? Kind of refreshing.

The Grey List is forgiving today. We wish you a happy birthday and have fun bumpin’ beans with Sam Ronson. We agree with her holiness the Dalai Tequila, GET OUT WITH IT ALREADY.

Something about the Fourth of July. It’s a day to celebrate patriotism; to drink Budweiser, eat massive amounts of BBQ, and simultaneously setting off illegal fireworks with your buddies with potato salad all over your face. I love how celebrities celebrate though… everything is a photo-op and a chance to dress up dramatically to fit the “part”.

Here Audrina Patridge plays the “I’m just an All-American, patriotic, girl next door from Down South, bucket of KFC, braided hair” part. We get it, you have a bangin’ bod. Girlfriend just rolled straight out of a Tommy Hilfiger commercial in that get-up.

I’m over it. You know whats not American? Starring in a self-indulgent shitty semi-”reality” tv show. Happy Fourth, eat too much Pasta Salad and get fat please… the rest of America is starting to get annoyed.

Tara Reid.
NOT looking like a lowlife, lush, or in a blacked out wet t-shirt contest.

…to say the least, I’m amazed. She looks somewhat normal and actually quite cute. Homegirl is rockin’ that belly-tee. I say, thumbs up for not looking like a trainwreck with crazy eyes. I had a roommate once that had those same crazy eyes, and I say to the both of them- you look better when the eyeliner isn’t running down your face and your blacked out eating easy mac; but that’s just what I think.

Cheers to that.

Stop.
Drop.
Shut ‘em down, open up shop.
ohhhh, noooo,
that’s how ruff ryders roll.

HAAAAAAAAAHAHAHHA DMX got arrested again.
Seriously, I think he did it just to get his name back out in the public again, cause lord knows the guy isn’t making money off mix tapes anymore. Earl Simmons (yeah what a dork name) has been arrested on many accounts… animal cruelty, drugs and driving misdemeanors, whatever.

He got off the plane at Phoenix and was immediately welcomed by police officers. Seriously, I’m ending this piece right now. I’m not dedicating any more words to a story that really doesn’t need any…not too Grey, but just for today.

PIVOOOOOT!!!! PIVOOOTTTTTT!!!!!
yes. this HAS to be the sub-title of the new Friends movie. yeah, I know… a freaking FRIENDS movie!!

There’s already a lot of hate out there going towards this project but yours truly is personally, very excited. This show epitomized the 90’s. Rachel’s hair, Tom Selleck, the nubbin, come on… true icons. So in our nostalgic nod to the 90’s, the crew is getting together back at Central Perk to celebrate the history we all have with smelly cat and co.

There are speaks that each member will make over 19 million each to play these parts (now i KNOW that Matt LeBlanc is pining for that shit after the failure, and I mean FAILURE, of the Joey spinoff).

Ross is currently starring in London’s West End, but sources say that inbetween rehearsals David Schwimmer has been on the phone constantly to thrash out a deal to get ‘Friends’ turned into a movie. “David Schwimmer and Jennifer Aniston are the first to make positive noises regarding the film and it is thought once they are on board the others will follow suit.”

Let’s be real for like TWO minutes here…

-Lisa Kudrow, pretty much the last thing she did of note was Analyze This HA
-Matt LeBlanc, you owe me my time spent watching Joey back… seriously, that show sucked ass.
-Courtney Cox, you’re married to David Arquette… enough said
-David Schwimmer… West End?
-Matthew Perry… how many DUI’s have you gotten since the end of Friends? I’m sure you need cash to pay those off…
-Jennifer Aniston… good press from the John Mayer thing but he’s a dick, so it’s not positive.. & Brad Pitt left you in the dust for Angie (yeah she looks fat.. I don’t care if she’s preggers… you’re still skinnier than her, HA).

I say bring back Chandler Bing and his bad puns!
The cheesy montage intro of fearless friends playing in a fountain!
Give us Joey’s guido attitude!
Rachels neuroses are neccessary!
Ursula HAS to make a return!

I say BRING IT! I will watch this movie and hope that Ross’ eternal dorkiness and Chandler’s cynicism will continue to make my heart warm inside. Long live the sitcom (screw reality tv these days), long live our Friends at Central Perk.

(&I better see me some Gunther, that guy always creeped me out…. how did he get such white hair?)
Hopefully Frasier will be the next sitcom to movie. haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.